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Unalived by Hopelessness

Warning! This read is heavy in terms of context. Please be advised. 

Disclaimer!! I am not. A mental health professional or provider. However, I have worked as a motivational interviewer and have experienced clients with suicidal ideation in the past. This post also contains my personal account, my opinion, and observations.

There are several categories of people who are unalived by suicide, and there are many reasons that lead to these actions. Everything is overwhelmed with inescapable unfavorable outcomes in areas such as serious mental illness, harassment, bullying, legal matters, forms of abuse, relationship troubles, personal and internal issues, religion and religious abuse, financial, business, media, government corruption, feelings of doom, and many other stressors. Many may experience a complex combination of the aforementioned.

The one I have personally experienced was hopelessness. It’s a feeling of despair; you do not have any positive feelings towards your future. You have lost optimism and become cynical towards life. You believe that nothing is going to change. Things will only get worse from here I don’t see things turning around. The glass is not even a quarter full at this point in life.

There are a million ways to end your life, and sometimes it’s an intentional way. It’s not just a choice or escape as most see it. Many see it as the only solution. I am here to enlighten those of you who feel like the act is a selfish act and that life is full of choices, and they chose the cowardly way out. These individuals are simply tired!

Suicide is the act of intentionally harming himself with the intention and motive to cause harm that will lead to death.  The heightened form of depression where medication and other methods seemed to have failed an individual. 

While some of you may cringe at the very thought of getting life insurance and creating a will others are planning their end. People say how selfish of someone to do this. Let’s talk about that. 

Do you believe that people sit around and say “ humph how can I hurt, devastate and traumatize my loved ones?” No! They actually perceive themselves as a burden and that live for all will be better and simply go on. We have seen it with some many. They become distant memories and that’s just the way life is. People will bounce back IF affected. All will be well when I’m gone. 

People think that there are obvious signs. Blatant signs where people become withdrawn, lose weight, focus and drive, sort out all their affairs, write letters, post stats on social media, and disappear. It’s simple declines like failure to practice basic self-care, refusal to take medication, failure to keep up with medical appointments, lack of interest in things that once brought joy, and subtleties. Many may still participate in activities, trying to act normal, but you’ll notice that the spark is gone. 

Sometimes it’s the high functioning individual, always smiling and producing. The one with trophies, accolades. massive platforms and money. This intentional act comes from enduring pain that cannot be easily remedied. A posture of hopelessness. It’s like going down a dark staircase. You may be afraid of the dark but for some reason something intrigues you to go. If you never been there you’ll never be able to relate. 

I encourage you never to minimize anyone’s experience when they share their stories, or trauma with you. Sometimes silence is okay too. A hug and genuine concern goes a long way. I use that word genuine because oftentimes it’s the empathic individuals that are depressed. These people have a special ability to interpret and understand behaviors, atmospheric changes. They pick up when you  have changed( even in the slightest sense) and are now just tolerating them. They feel everything and often feel alone.  They will know something is up and prepare themselves to quickly detach.

We only check on people during certain seasons when trauma occurred or maybe the holidays for those who may not have families but trust me when I say those are not times people feel alone. Loneliness doesn’t mean this person is literally isolated.  They just don’t feel a deep connection with those around them  people don’t seem to comprehend their need for a sense of belonging or connectivity. 

Society does give room for people to have breakdowns or express real feelings. We have things to do, places to go and people to see. You don’t want to worry anyone  or bring down the mood so what do you do put on your outside mask. Many are taugt to “suck it up “, “buck up”, “perk or pep up” immediately or after a short while, whether you’ve processed your feelings or not. It’s like sweeping things under a rug, eventually you’ll have allergies, an asthmatic reaction or just sneeze from the buildup up   You cannot operate like nothing happened or is happening. Sometimes the feelings don’t have language because people don’t quite understand why they feel the way they do: they haven’t identified their triggers or been burdened with their own questions and yet to find tools that work.

Yes, even in this “woke” generation where there is an increase of mental health awareness. A great awakening, but many of us are sleepwalking. We’re up but not fully conscious of our surroundings. Certain religious groups, corporate America, and in certain cultures, you’re humiliated and shamed for having a moment. An ignominious disgrace. This is why so many suffer in silence. People endure pain alone because they will be deemed crazy, people won’t get it, will be viewed as weak, perceived as someone without strong faith, and the labels continue on. The stigma is very prominent, and in today’s cancel culture, the last thing anyone wants to do is expose how they truly feel.

The d word people abused during this generation .. depression. That’s a real sickness and not a mood but rather a mode. A song stuck on repeat. You don’t choose it that spirit  hints you. You may feel strong and fight it. Your bounce back is strong and you’re fine. There are times when some people just struggle more than others. Life has beaten on them so much that they lost the strength to fight. Their curse words are motivation, determination and grit. Seemed so far fetched, unattainable. Why is everything so hard for me one may ask? 

3 am questions about worth and purpose plague them. Oftentimes, people with the biggest purpose in the planet struggle with questions about their identity and value to the world. They have an innate desire to do something big but struggle to attain it.  These people aren’t weak they’re strong, fighting every day to see clearly in the midst of muddied circumstances and situations. People just want to end pain and complex trauma. Some have eating disorders, some use substances others self-mutilate, and then eventually grow weary of doing so. This death is a surrender to hopelessness. The feeling of nothing working, life gave you a “bad hand”. You’re not seeing it as the strong ones getting tested; it’s unfair and unbearable. 

People say “oh, just play some music and find things that bring you joy!”… but what happens when that doesn’t work? There’s being down and there’s depression. Trust me, there are levels to this. Depression is actually a health condition listed under disabilities as of late. It is a persistent feeling of unshakeable sadness. From my perspective, it is coupled with loss of optimism, loss of hope, loss of appetite (or gain), loss of interest. loss of energy, mood swings, and feelings of guilt. It can be medically induced by brain or hormonal imbalances, and so much more. This disease comes to strip you of yourself.

It’s so imperative that we treat others with kindness. Your one bad day may be someone’s last straw and a huge trigger. For those who may say “someone’s demeanor or happiness shouldn’t be my responsibility “. It isn’t oh, self-centered one. It’s not about you, but let’s practice the ancient art of empathy, shall we? Doesn’t hurt or cost you anything to be cordial. Some who claim that discernment and emotional awareness are their strength should definitely do better. How we treat people matters. We have no idea what they deal with, and no it isn’t your responsibility. We all have life stressors, we all have major decisions and life-altering experiences, but we don’t all recover from it. 

Let’s discuss an interesting word, support. LOL. Oh, silly rabbit, it looks different for everyone, and one cannot assume that we “showed up” for someone by your own definitions. When you love someone, you learn their love languages, not expect your perception of love and support to fit like a tailored suit. For those with a superhero complex. You can’t love someone out of depression. However, you can just be a good human. Support may be a simple call, short text, brunch, and the list goes on. Support is definitely not telling someone off, thinking rough love is going to work to someone depressed, trust me, they’re already hard on themselves. The people close to us can tell when things have shifted. Normalize having hard conversations and asking uncomfortable questions regarding your relationship and any shifts in behavior or demeanor but take it easy. 

Support is also not limiting someone’s experience. “By now you’ve should have gotten over that”. or my favorite “I went through that too but you don’t hear me still discussing it or being affected today?”  You cannot compare pain  that’s unwise. One can carry 200 lbs when others can’t barely make a move with 80 lbs. Resilience has to be built and just like the gym those tools come from a licensed professional. 

Support is not using cliches and generalized commentary expecting the person just to perk up. Support can be prayer, a pop-up, and more. I got a lot of quotes with scriptures as a child like “be anxious for nothing” We did NOT have discussions about why I was feeling that way.. I was dealing with a lot and my parents had no idea. My life was being threatened by gangs, people who threatened to rape me, and a few jealous females. I’ve always been strong, and peer pressure was often defeated. I was the quiet mighty one. Like the condiment “sweet heat”. I was loving and gentle but can pack a verbal or literal punch. I wasn’t going to take anything lying down. However, I was deemed rebellious for not being “super religious”. I was also dealing with abuse, neglect, feelings of abandonment, molestation, and now my safety was threatened at church and in school.

I am a “PK” or preachers/prophets kid living under a microscope with tremendous pressure to be an perfect example for my peers. I didn’t have anyone to confide in. I was over it. I was crying myself to sleep and nobody could carry the weight of my truth. My parents proved they didn’t have time to listen and didn’t take certain issues seriously. I didn’t know what else to do. and started starving myself In middle school. I remember going to my cousin’s bridal fitting as a bridesmaid. As my mother and I graced the streets of Kings Highway in Brooklyn; I was compelled to walk across the highway I saw a huge white Mack truck fast approaching, and thought this is it. Stand here, breathe in and let whatever happen, just happen. It will be fast, I was ready. 

Miraculously I ended up back on the pavement. Must have been an angel. My mother was frozen in shock and had a facial expression in couldn’t never forget. I stood there numb. She began walking in silence and I followed. I still don’t know how I was saved but I believe God intervened. We never addressed my public cry for help. Why did I share this? Depression isn’t just adults struggling it’s an 11 year old, a small child, a pre teen too. It’s imperative for parents to provide a safe space for their children to express themselves and to actively  listen. 

The rising numbers among children are tremendous. Life is different for this generation, so I admonish those of you who work with children also to be vigilant with learning your students and being supportive. My support system was my Teachers. For me, what saved me was Gods love. He was the help that pulled me from the edge. His unconditional love. If you don’t know him I admonish you to give Him a chance. Having a spiritual foundation and a good therapist to navigate life will help. Sometimes you just need language and some tools. Life will never be easy but there are forms of support to make it manageable. 

Song that comes to mind: “ I was here” by Beyoncé. I used to sing that, thinking I’m saying goodbye but God kept me here.  He used several people to interrupt my plans like my Aunty Sherry-Ann (shout out) got me in the nick of time when pills and alcohol became my besties. I had two sick parents, one passed, one was on the way. I couldn’t handle seeing the strongest people in my life in their weakest moments. My only sources of love and connection were leaving me, and I did not see the point in living. The phone lines that were constantly ringing were now silent; people no longer said hello because the real person they wanted to get to was no longer here. I was told to “get over it” a week after I buried my mother. I was deemed weak in my religious organization.

We can’t prevent suicidal ideation for those whose mind is already made up but I believe in mediation and mitigation. Encourage them to go to therapy, drive them to their appointment if you have to. God does send us angels. I later found strength in my faith and got past the darkest season of my life. To my aunt Sherry-Ann thank you for “believing me” and caring enough to show up when I didnt even want the help.

If you are experiencing suicidal thought a or feel like life isn’t working please try one more time. I beg you to call or text 988, the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. Help is available. Please put down that object or substance. There’s another side to life we need you here to witness it. It won’t be like this always. 

Again the people with the GREATEST purpose endure the GREATEST life challenges but you can survive and overcome. You matter, YOU WILL make it! 

I’m recommending some resources:

Please call or text 988, the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. 

For a Licensed Professional, please email: Info@keepsmilingtherapy.com

#GoGetYourSmileBack 

Check out my mental wellness journal “Cathartic Expressions” on Amazon https://a.co/d/3fleAYD

Dr. Earl O’Brien Jr., MHC, CLC, BCCC Volume 1 “The Crisis Compass” available on Barnes & Nobles https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-crisis-compass-earl-obrien/1148001099?ean=9798218756833 and also on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FJM15HN9/ref=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cso_cp_apin_dp_9JH35S895J37BJM649AA

Love Always,

A survivor!

“EMPOWER.ENCOURAGE, EQUIP”– Christine A. George 

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“Spin Da Block”

“Spin Da Block” is an urban term or slang that refers to the act of returning, another attempt, or a second chance. Think of it as walking around an actual block in circles. You are not truly distant, you’re in the area just not authentically present.

After a door is closed sometimes it serves as a reminder to keep it that way. We are sometimes too lenient and grant access to those who should remain outdoors. Knowing your worth will cause you to be very intentional about every connection. It will enable you to set standards, create boundaries, and abide by them.

Ask yourself “What type of people do I want to engage in my life?”, “Who and what no longer serves me?”, “Are the people I am surrounded by positive?” the list can continue forever. After establishing where you would like to go in your life, it’s imperative to surround yourself with like-minded individuals and be mindful of having healthy relationships.

Recognizing your worth is only the initial stage, being proactive about investing in yourself is another. Daily, we are challenged to choose right and to choose better than we did yesterday. Your emotional well-being and safety should be paramount on our lists.

When someone you were once romantic with or attracted to attempts to “spin da block” we often ask ourselves “What is it that this person wants THIS time”, insinuating that there was a level of engagement that had ended. Sometimes people enter a certain chapter of their lives and like to leave bookmarks. They “ghost” you or “leave you hanging”, wondering if you did something wrong or questioning what happened.

These types of individuals are great manipulators and often are masters of breadcrumbing and gaslighting. They like leaving a bookmark so they can pick up exactly where they left off with you. This prevents you from moving on to your next chapter. If they hold a key to your heart, this can be troubling and challenging. Some of us haven’t changed the locks to our hearts so they come and go as they please. We as humanity have to know when it’s time for a change. Let people circle all they want even to linger in front of your home but you do not have to answer.

Do that upgrade to your home (self), invest, pursue, expand, and broaden your horizons. When people are inside, they get comfortable and take advantage of the access but as soon as they are no longer permitted and see that enhancements are being made, they come running back and don’t allow it. Recognize that this is a game for most.

This doesn’t just apply to romantic connections; but to friends and other people who have displayed a toxic track record. You know the saying “When people show you who they are, believe them!”. Don’t just guard your heart (Bible) guard the entry and access points too. Sau “Yes!” to our best selves and say “No!” to all things and people contrary. Then you can make room for growth, development, inspiration, and ability to thrive. Remove that old bookmark and let the next chapter begin!

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When someone you were once romantic with or attracted to returns in your life.

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CONGRATULATIONS!

No IMPOSTER SYNDROME for me. I earned everything by the Grace of God. I know sometimes when you have been in the wilderness so long, when you finally make it to the promised land you are apprehensive and don’t know how to celebrate. You will ask yourself “Is this real?” and “How long will this last?”… What we fail to realize is that HE IS A PROMISE Keeper.

It’s okay you can put that heavy bag down; you can rest here. It’s okay to rejoice, IT’S SAFE! However, while in jubilee still maintain that work ethic, trust God, and recognize that nothing would be possible without Him because our steps are ordered. He never said it would be easy, just possible if you only believe. We’re not self-made anything, HE ALLOWED it. CONGRATULATIONS! You did well. You did something about what God told you. You pursued that thing you worked hard and finally accomplished it. ITS NOT SMALL! So, celebrate this new you, new day, new beginning but keep Him centered and give Him all the glory.

My new year started on August 1st, and I am already in 2025. I just want to be present in the present recognizing that all things work out for my good and that in itself is a PRESENT.

Stand on His promises, He will not fail you, He is not a liar!

Shameless Plug: Stand on God’s promises and be reminded of his goodness by securing your copy today https://a.co/d/06j4pg7

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Sweet on You

I’m Sweet On You

From childhood to adulthood, most of us crave something savory, rich, creamy, and sweet. The sales grow by at least 5% worldwide and it’s all for ice cream. Ice cream serves as a treat, an escape, a snack, a dessert, a mood booster, and most certainly a comfort food.

Your taste buds may go from simple to an expanded pallet, but it will always be something to crave whether it’s a heat wave or cold outside. We all have our preferences in flavors and serving options. Some like vanilla, chocolate, strawberry, and even exotic flavors. Others like it fried, as a milkshake, some out of a bowl, some on a cone, and others straight out of the container. There are others who focus on texture and feel and prefer it hard, soft, or even melted.  Regardless of how you like it, you just have to have it.

Coldstones is a popular crematory ice cream chain. You get a customized order of your liking. You choose everything from the size and toppings; you can choose from signatures or design your own, it is a true experience. One thing I have always loved was the sizing options, it’s labeled creatively. The three basic sizes are “like it”, “love it” and “gotta have it” which to me gives a sensual connotation. More than your typical reference but truly reminds me of sex.

Nothing’s taboo here, we all like “ice cream”. Think about the description, how we prefer it to be served, favors, sizes, and more. Your mind can run wild here but there’s something special I gained from reviewing the sizes. In relationships, we either come in with preferences or attain them along with way with experience. Your body will speak to you about the levels of sex and intimacy you crave. Many relationships fall apart for several reasons and one major one is a unsatisfied partner. While intimacy, quality time, and other aspects of a relationship are essential for growth, security, and longevity; connectivity plays a major role. Your hormones control your moods and many aspects of your personal life and permeate into the pores of your relationship. Many people will tell you that things started to go downhill after their sex life began suffering.

It’s imperative to ask hard and sometimes intrusive questions while dating or courting. You need to know what your partner’s needs and desires are. Not always will they match a hundred percent but it’s good insight. Use that detail to make an informed decision about your future together. For instance, let’s go back to the Coldstones measurements LIKE IT. LOVE IT. GOTTA HAEIT. A partner who merely enjoys sex linked with a partner who has to have it is going to struggle a bit. One partner may feel unsatisfied or if not spoken about internalize the body language as a rejection. Others may feel that one partner is too focused on sex and that other things do not matter to them which could be completely wrong. Your mismatched libidos (sex drives) can cause a dilemma and much frustration. There is a thing called sex drive discrepancy (SDD) when partners experience different levels or a different frequency of sexual activity. It’s like wanting to share your ice cream with your lover but they are lactose intolerant. This may not mean that you are with the wrong person. However, it does mean it’s something to discuss.

Communication should be paramount in your relationship. Couples should consider this topic while calm and when both partners are ready to be transparent. I would suggest before becoming intimate, so you have an idea of what you’re walking into. If I had to go somewhere temporarily, I would pack for it, which calls for preparation. You need to do some research, is it cold or hot? How do I brace myself for my intended experience? Be prepared to actively listen and communicate your needs unapologetically, discuss your levels of freakiness or openness (a whole other discussion), safe words, and things you’re comfortable and uncomfortable with. Discuss what makes you feel appreciated, and what feels good, and define what pleasure means to you. Don’t give up on each other, be patient, find common ground if you can, and work on meeting in the middle. Remember that ninety percent of communication is non-verbal and what you don’t discuss is left up to your partner’s imagination, assumption, and misinterpretation. Having a healthy relationship includes all aspects of your relationship being addressed. Let your partner feel and know that you’re sweet on them! Enjoy your sweet treat!

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Sonic the Hedgehog Movie Review

I believe that the Sonic the Hedgehog movie was more than just your averaged feel-good movie filled with action and adventure. There is an undertone of understanding your power and the power of acceptance.

The Hedgehog named Sonic is the main character. He grows up sheltered because he was born gifted and couldn’t control or understand his power nor the way the world worked. He was able to use his gift and master skills but he had much to learn about life, interaction with others, social cues, and the perception of danger.

After losing a parent tragically, he has to grow up fast taking care of himself and living in the shadows. Hiding to keep his gifts from being exposed in fear of being captured. I learned that powerful people will always have a target on their backs. People who are different aren’t understood, they are first judged. There is another group of people who are eager to control, manipulate, and use those who are different or vulnerable  in order to feel powerful. Have you ever noticed that most villains had some tragic life event they never healed from? They end up bitter and evil and that’s where narcissism, evil, arrogance, and world domination come from. Most villains wear their insecurities as garments to seek control and simultaneously revenge by projecting their feelings onto the innocent.

Sonic dealt with just that. An evil dominating figure who used technology and achievements to create a grandiose self-image to mask his low self-worth and past. Sonic was seen as an outsider and a threat.  He was pursued but what the mad scientist didn’t understand was the power of acceptance and community. Sonic developed a trusting relationship and was genuinely loved and accepted. Someone took time to know him and see him for who he was. They didn’t want to consume or smother his gifts but teach him how to operate in wisdom and discretion.

They also taught him balance. He got the lesson of a lifetime by learning that “all his life he didn’t have to fight” (or in this case run). There was no longer a need for a “ring of escape” with a “ring of support”. Someone had his back this time, finally, he was not alone. He can finally pause and slow down. His friends welcomed him into their lives, home, family, and most of all hearts and that’s what the real connection was about. Fur or skin they connected on human values and issues and established common ground. We all need that to go where we are loved and settle where we are accepted. I learned that inclusion and equity are not the same. One action says “I’m tolerating your presence” while the other boldly proclaims that “you are welcome and have a place here”.

“there was no longer a need for a ring of escape with a ring of support!”

Sonic participated in the exchange of love, friendship, and acceptance. He taught others that what they thought of as mundane, or average was something special and to be grateful. He had a new perspective on life and the world the humans lived in within the small town. What he witnessed was trust, honor and community and he highlighted the fat that they should never take it for granted. Sonic was privileged to experience what most crave, a healthy relationship. I have a few questions for you…

  1. Are the people in your life reciprocating love and support?
  2. Are you in an environment where you are accepted?
  3. Is your voice respected? and is there autonomy?
  4. Do you feel seen, heard, and understood?
  5. Do you feel safe and protected?
  6. Are there balanced relationships?
  7. What do you define as a healthy community?

If you answered “no” to any of these questions, what would you do to change it? We’re not going to make it in this world alone. We need the right people to endure challenges, help us realize our full potential, grow and accept the dreams really do come true.

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All About the Benjamins Baby!

People say money changes folks. We hear that argument all the time. Have we ever stopped to consider that maybe wealth or affluence strengthens and highlights the nature of some? We never stop to analyze someone’s roots as opposed to judging their leaves.

The easiest thing to say is “It’s all GREED!”. Many have allowed wealth or affluence to influence and inflate their perception of themselves. These people tend to forget who and what matters. Financial liberties remove certain obligations, fears, insecurities, and controls. Some may even feel invincible, they believe the world is their oyster and tend to live an entitled, bossy, demanding, and often selfish life. However, that’s not always the case.

Some people are intentionally deprived and neglected by a family member, caretaker, or even spouse. When the individual finally got stable, they ensured their mental and financial well-being was secure by keeping their distance. They didn’t change, they pretty much gave you the same energy in reverse. They haven’t forgotten. If someone truly meant you well and wanted to see you develop your financial gain should be celebrated, they owe you nothing if you helped them from an authentic place. What people do with their funds has nothing to do with anyone else. They are entitled to that perspective. After all, it is their money.

Financial freedom is literal independence. The joy of not relying on anyone else gives you confidence and autonomy. You do not have to comply with instructions or commands. You are free to make certain choices. When you’re dependent, that individual controls you and your money. Some of us have been there, life gets challenging, and you have faced home insecurity, and you’re left at the mercy of a friend or family member. Decisions you make are often funneled through their influence or demands. When you’ve worked hard to achieve your dreams and goals and finally get somewhere; you will ensure that all distractions, leeches, users, and manipulators are nowhere near you.

Others come from impoverished backgrounds. They have an intense background in harsh environments such as underserved communities and extreme poverty. They often fight to get out and stay out. These individuals often encounter people with low ambition, mentalities, or a limited view of the world and their future.  Many have an attitude of entitlement or believe that because of their circumstance the government and everyone else owes them. C’mon it’s humanity reaching out right? WRONG! I come from a West Indian background we say “grabby grabby” and use other terms to state that people’s hands are always outstretched for something they didn’t work for. Look at how many countless celebrities have helped family members who only used them and sucked them dry. No ambition, no drive, no desire to grow. They are now the worst human being to ever live when choose to distance themselves. Your true colors have blurred lines of boundaries. Muggy consistency and unclear intentions.

Many are good people who had poor experiences. Financial abuse and trauma and then a life of comfort breeds stability which someone will fight to protect their status. Someone could be mistreated and when they attain their desired status, they feel no obligation to help or aid. Some people are so benevelant and they put boundaries in place to protect their assets which includes their heart.Howeverk, they gibve back to their community and ensure loved ones are invested in.

Your financial status is a huge aspect of your life journey. We are either a monster waiting to get out, eager to make change and reform, selfish, giving or greedy. Who you are you deep down only gets unlocked with wealth. Who are you? What is your character defined by?

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Why Public Figures Should Be Respected

Reasons why I respect celebrities…

1. Takes a lot of mental fortitude to deal with stress and consistent demands.

2. There are a lot of personalities to deal with via teams etc. and you have to remain YOU. You are your brand. Reputation is life.

3. You MUST consistently showup! regardless of how you feel or whatever you have going on. #showmustgoon

4. People to confide in, those numbers decrease as you increase.

5. Sometimes it’s difficult to determine or differentiate when someone’s with you or a “yes man” with their own motives.

6. Your Automomy is something to fight for on all levels.

7. Constantly under the microscope

8. In a world of tech and digital, you deal with trolls, naysayers, stalkers etc. Your response is either warranted or just observed.

9. You must be wise about when and how to respond.

10. More money, more problems!

11. You finally learn that the little things matter.

12. Your vulnerable in SO MANY WAYS, yet you try to grip on to a form of normalcy.

13. You can do whatever you want, but you cannot do whatever you want.

14. Your craft and skills are your business tools.

15 Automaically become a business person and still must balance your career with home life.

16. Great responbility to be a good boss, leader, example and or role model. People don’t care about accolades as much as to how you treat them.

17. Anyone with longevity in any field should be applauded. We’re as good as what we did yesterday.

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Empathy is a Cure

Empathy is the antidote for bullying. For both adults and children. We often forget that we all are human. We judge, scrutinize, and ostracize what we don’t understand or immediately relate to. We have blind spots as humans; we crave “likeness” and commonalities. We accept and open up to folks who directly reflect ourselves. My Pastor says that “the definition of unity is diversity” – Dr. Courtney Bradley. How do we grow, expand our horizons if we don’t expose ourselves to treasures within others?

We do judge a book by its cover, sometimes we have a grand sense of self wondering why everyone else won’t get it together. We’re so quick to forget that your strengths may be someone else’s weakness.

It’s imperative to have emotional intelligence especially if you’re leading or coaching other human beings. Don’t be the one with the blade, aim to be the bandage. Bishop also says, “you can only cure if you care!”

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Management

Dear Leader

One management style does not work for everyone on your team. Flexibility is applicable in leadership as well. We must consistently grow and develop just like we expect our team members to.