They often say that “familiarity breeds contempt” I slightly disagree. It is a known fact that as people draw close despite the nature of their relationship they become relaxed.
I have been very close to every Employer I had and yet what made them love me is my understanding of boundaires. What made me different?… RESPECT. When you care for someone or honor thier title you will respect them. Respect will put you in check and remind you about where you stand and whats apporpraite. I get comfortable but not too comfortable.
There is also what I like to call the “Power of Invitation”, if your leader or authority figure invites you into thier personal lives. Its a great sign on trust and confidence that you are responsible for. You given that exclusive key should also keep in mind that your mouth should operate as a safe. Your motives need to be clear and pure. So when people get close and hurt others was it beacuse of the familiar behavior or was it because they got acess to a door without the right heart and character to remian in the building??
Social and Racial Inequality
I typicially refrain from speaking about touchy topics such as racial and social injustice but I think it is time. I am appalled by the news and current events that have swept the nation. Racism never died it was under a rug.
Now the rug has collected too much dust, someone or a group of people grew allergic and decided to dust out that mat. Lifting to unveil certain issues opened Pandora’s box but it is critical to know what we are living with. Police brutality has been more blatant and in our faces especially if you livein the inner city. Many people fought against and spoke against such expereinces. Time and time again we receive sadening news about another life loss without just cause.
Officers have “dash cams” to record events as well as protect themselves. I strongly believe that the average vehicle should have such technology built in. If were doing to talk about equality lets start with that. I think it would be great if vehicles came with an option to upload footage to your cloud immediately by the push of a button. I truly beleive that it can save lives or at least be a voice to voicelss especially if thier lives are taken. Many racists are very vocal about thier stance and exercise thier freedom of speech (1st Amendment). This world we live in is becoming more and more dangerous and it is crucial to protect yourself by any means necessary. I am in favor of creating this upgrade to American vehiciles. I hope someone sees this and really takes it into consideration.
Have you reached the lowest point of your life, feeling all hope is lost and to make it worse you feel alone??….WAIT A SECOND… Don’t give up. God allows this on purpose to prove His purpose and show you yours. It always gets worse before it gets better PLEASE HOLD ON!!! He’s gonna show up STRONG and then you’ll have one of those testimonies to say “wow look how far I have come” but He will get all the glory because nobody will be able to say they did it. Give Him permission to work. Take your hand off the wheel be a passenger and watch how your life will shift direction and route.
Oftentimes we talk about vicious cycles and how we want to be the end to them in our bloodlines. Its like a never ending song thats horrifying to your ears and peace.Guess what? Its not enough just to recognize a cycle. You have to be vigalent and proactive about strategic ways to prevent you from going down the same path.
We mostly become products of what we see, hear and experience. You have to make a conscious decision not to become “another one”. I just want to encourage someone that if you let God handle your life I can assure you with his directions and your obedience to HIm you will succeed and surpass all that is represented in your blood line. No you don’t have to accept whats preveleant. You may ask yourself well how am I different or special? It’s your mentality. If you can recognize and diagnose and issue your not on the same page. The ones called to make the difference is typically the one that feels odd and had a unique perspective. Go ahead and be great and be the change you want to see.
Just as I predicted, this Quarantine experience of 2020 is life changing. Its not just an interruption in our daily lives but a disruption mentally. So many of us have a heavy bag of emotions, fears, concerns and trauma to unpack.
Its both wise and healthy during this time to seek help, to be open and honest about how we are all feeling and make sure there’s a safety net for when you do let go of these burdens. Make sure you have a safe space or network of people who can help you make sense of what your experiencing.
For me, After the reality set in that I was a COVID-19 Survivor, my anxiety increased, I had difficulty sleeping and the list goes on. I experienced “Survivors Remorse” and I had no idea at the time that I was dealing with PTSD. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is no joke. Having flashbacks, night sweats, intensified anxiety, crying on and off or just consistently. I was a mess. I found someone to speak to and turned to my faith to help me through this process.
Depression was something I suffered silently with as a juvenile and even worse I was extremely functional. I led several groups and organizations; I was friendly and social and I kept everyone smiling and I wore one myself. Folks close to me just thought I was moody and it was difficult to express. I will encourage everyone to tap into a outlet, hobbie or find a new passion. I choose dance, songwriting, poetry, art and music as a way to express myself. Trust me, it was not easy getting here many days I wanted to do absolutely nothing but in times like this that’s when we need to discover new things. Discovery of new hobbies also excavates new strength and hope. This moment in time may be stressful but your moments alone don’t have to be.
This Quarantine is giving many of us extra time to relish, analyze and actually confront some things in our lives. I highly encourage everyone to take advantage of this opportunity to address some things when life returns (not back to normal) you will need a free conscious, liberated mind and a new found perspective on life.
This time is stressful but does not have to be!
Life is short and the window of opportunity is even shorter. This is the perfect time to establish, precure or solidify your relationship with God. Trust me, in these times we need divine intervention. Facing your issues from childhood, current trauma or issues are never easy but its necessary. Maybe you’re not dealing with pain or even loss but maybe at a crossroads of life where your trying to determine your next step, your next move in your career, education or marital status. We all have a mountain to conquer but we can’t do that we a heavy backpack. Take some moments to address what your prepared for. Ask yourself the hard questions like “Do I have a plan or strategy for this?” or “have I done the research?”. This moment in time you will not get back so use it wisely and know that you’re a blessed Treasure. Diamonds undergo a lot of pressure and other in tense processes before they begin sparkling. Before you go on display make sure your worthy of the platform.
According to Google, the superhero complex or Messiah Complex, also known as the hero syndrome, or hero complex, is one of these, and is when someone has an inherent desire, a compulsion, to help people. However, it is not officially a disorder or disease.
While this may be true to the secular world, this should be the very desire of the Kingdom of God if we truly have the heart of Christ. Not a complex but a Christ effect. The strong desire to help people should be so compelling for us as Christians. Christ walked the earth and inspired many with his teachings. What He was mostly recognized for was the miracles that he worked. The Bible says in John 14:12 (KJV) Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that believeth on me, the works that I do shall he do also; and greaterworks than these shall he do; because I go unto my Father. If He arose with ALL power and has given us access to it, it means we have authority by His spirit. With that God given power and authority it is to carry on his demeanor, mentality and do what He did but in a greater capacity.
Every parent who has accomplished or achieved something in life, their greatest desire is for their offspring to find their own path to fulfilling and continuing the legacy. God the Father is no different. He wants His children to follow in His footsteps. To take over the business of loving everyone from a pure place. That love is a breeding ground for fruit like compassion, patience and so much more. In a time like this, where the world is panicked due to a pandemic, its important for us to share our light and love. To the body of Christ, what we have; it’s not a complex, disorder or disease. It’s the very absence of all things unhealthy that enables us to function and flow. 1 John 3:1King James Version (KJV)Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God: therefore, the world knoweth us not, because it knew him not. We have been given superpowers to help heal and free. What we must keep in mind is that we are sidekicks we are not the main character or attraction. We must do our part (not for our own gloating or recognition) but to ensure that Christ is seen, heard and glorified.
I don’t know about you, but I love a good Superhero. I grew up admiring Batman (my favorite), Superman, Wonder Woman, Power Rangers, Ninja Turtles and so much more. I admired their compassion for others and willingness to go above and beyond to save others even if it meant they would be at high risk or danger. I noticed that they monitor things going on which means they were in tune with their community. As soon as a cry for help was made, they were moved with compassion and immediately responded. They lived their lives but knew when to shift gears to become what the people needed.
The world is currently simultaneously on their knees, a united cry for help and deliverance. The word says in 2 Chronicles 7:14 (KJV)Ifmypeople, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. If we cry out sincerely our Super Hero, the Hero of heroes will show up.
Jesus is that Superhero that was waiting to be called on. He has been overlooked and underestimated. He was put on the “backburner” while we sought out other gods and sources of refuge. What we are coming to realize is that He is Hero that we can love, trust and depend on. He shifts gears to become what we need and he is HERE as a provider, keeper, life preserver, covering and so much more if we stop to count our blessings.
Psychologically speaking, some believe that we have a tendency to fall in love with the first person to show us kindness after trauma, disappointment or problematic life experiences. When we feel we can finally exhale and consider ourselves “safe”, it maybe the opposite. It’s dangerous when someone is aware of your mental state and condition and peruses you with a hidden agenda or motive It’s also harmful when the victim falls in love with their savior because its known as transference. The unconscious act of transferring all energy and emotions on to another. The person offering help is viewed as a personal love interest. We don’t recognize that they are just there to help. You may just be their assignment but its not a love connection. Vice versa if your called to help you can’t date your assignment. Remember we are the sidekicks on assignment to clear the way like First Responders until the true HERO steps on the scene.
In some cases, it’s just good Samaritans (Angels) who enter our lives at the right time. Trust me it’s not by coincidence its God orchestrated. He has us on a schedule and a path. Whether you deviate or not, He is still in control. Jesus is that Superhero the world needs now. He is the only one who wouldn’t take advantage. He is here to not just help but heal and deliver. He is concerned about your mental, physical, emotional and physical state. After all we have encountered, He comes on the scene just in time and has no other desire but to love us. He is completely safe, the only thing He desires in return is our hearts. To truly love him and not know that where Christ is there is no more crisis (often said by Bishop Courtney Bradley). If what the world needs now is love and refuge, let’s seek it in God. Believers, its time to really be authentic points of contact and portray what we often profess.
I know I am not the only one wondering what life would be like after the Corona Virus and Social distancing has been lifted? Do we all flood MTA like before the same way or is there a change? Do we go on interviews and shake hands or is physical contact going to be limited? After we haven’t seen loved ones in a while do we rush to give giant hugs and kisses? What about concerts and other major events will they be cancelled and if not, is it even safe to host? Will a new wave or strand be birthed after? So many questions.
Another one of my concerns is mental health. Some people are going in sane with cabin fever. They haven’t the slightest clue of how to relax or occupy. New Yorkers have it bad, we are constantly on the move and I know speaking for myself its hard to be still. Will this affect relationships and marriages? With all the constant bad news of people passing but we never get a chance to say goodbye how does this affect us? For me, I am officially NUMB. I have braced myself to take on some hard hits while mayhem is in full effect. I think I may have to see a counselor after all the dust settles. My Pastor always says “don’t go crazy with the crazy!” I am trying to stay in my word and find spiritual homeostasis. We all need peace. The best we can do is trust God, pray but also talk to each other. I think we need to stay healthy by discussing our feelings and thoughts amongst each other. This is the time to come together!
In all of my years, I have yet to witness a Latino greet another by saying “what’s up Spick?” or Caribbean Indian calling each other “Coolie” or white people going “what up Cracker?” and the list goes on. However, I am always perturbed by the loose use of the word “Nigga” in my culture and society.
Many say that it’s used as a term of endearment now times have changed. The term “my nigga” is for someone your close to or highly respect. The “N” word is also used for societal greetings used amongst all races. Well that’s just my point. Everyone is comfortable using the “N” work to refer or greet any race and it is the new norm. How did we let that happen?
If the other races won’t use vulgar terms to refer to each other (due to its original associations) then why did we make it okay? Many would argue that we took back its power when we were able to use it ourselves. My question would be then if other races call each other nigga” its cute its them trying to be like us some form of cultural appropriation but yet if they use it ON us why have a problem? It should be alright, then right?
We speak about being “woke” but were still half asleep to the fact that slavery has left lasting impressions and imprints on our lives. It was okay to degrade each other then to be the “cool one on the plantation” but we degrade ourselves now to be cool with each other. To me, its not paying homage to the fact that we have overcome. Its ignorance at its finest, a psychological acceptance to a new connotation. That word has a root and although the land looks bare ‘cause the trees are gone doesn’t mean the roots are non-existent. What are we saying about and to our roots? We all ahve a right to free speech but are there no boundaries? Someone please help me understand.
I don’t want to continue talking about living Covid positive. I am over it too like most are. I definitely want to focus my efforts elswhere and plan for tomorrow.
I wanted to share a bit of my journey with you all to discuss how real this is. You hear about it being worse than any flu and that is true. There is no real words to explain it but I am so grateful everyday I open my eyes and realize God spared me once again.
I came to the this amazing Hospital (who will not be mentioned) due to their superior service. I had no idea that things will take a dramatic change. Its sad but NYC was never really prepared for an outbreak and I hope that in the near future we plan ahead. Upon arrival, I was greeted by Health Care officials to question if I was really sick. I sat in the waiting room with a temperature for hours. Finally, it happened another Asthmatic exaspiration.They require a mask but I can’t breathe, how does this work? Now I am gasping for air and the Staff cannot help me. Giving me treatments required me to be isolated because Nebulizers intensify whats in the atmsophere. Because they couldnt get me isolated in time, I almost passed out. I was hanging off of a chair holding my chest while others with great concerned looked on in pity. The medical team was afraid and working eagerly to find me a room.
After some time, they were able to provide treatments in a private room. I spent hours in there just crying because I knew how close I was to death. I eventually was admitted and got a really nice suite upstiars. My room was incredible and felt like a hotel. Service on the other hand was unfavorable until it wasn’t. Needing asssitance to get out of bed to get to the restroom was a trail. I would ring for a nurse and wait up to two hours before someone came. Its not thier fault, they were understaffed and overworked. I spent most of my days crying out to God and asking him for mercy. He is the breathe that I breathe. I realized how serious this was once fevers set in. I would sweat until all linings required chanigng and sit in my cold gown for hours. I would call for help but when they responded through the intercom and realize they dont understand me they just dely response to the request. I was dehydrated oftentimes but scared to drink the liquids. What would happen to me if I need to go to the bathroom? Going to the restroom now was a nightmare. I then required oxygen just to get from piont A to B.
Coughing hurt my chest. Its the feeling that you get when you have had the stomach virus and just the mere action in your stomach muscles moving are so painful. Coughing fits became the new norm where I couldnt stop to catch my breath during this time my bowels made decisions on thier own. I would never forget the feeling of coughing and just ending up in pool of my own urine(or whatever else) in seconds. Never thought I would need help to walk, talk, bathe or do basic things. We take so much for granted. Walking around dizzy and shortness of breathe is so dangerous and I was put on watch.
When my status was confirmed, I got the boot. The nice hotel stay was over. I got shifted to creepy budiling where I thought of the movie “Hostel”. This entire space was dedicated to COVID patients and is so depressing. Isolated, no family, put in a place where most dont expect you to make it is enough to have someone be depressed or just give up. Being here, I realized most of the battle was in your mind.
I was one of the first on this floor so it was weird but eventually beds began filling up. Watching some of my roomates also fight for thier lives was a bit traumatic. I started praying with the little breathe I had. Being Asthmatic intensifies everything. They clean everything they touch before and after with Lysol wipes. America never been so clean before. Crazy thing is peple with Asthma should not be exposed to strong cleaning products. Its damned if you do and dont. They gotta use these products for protocol sake. Everytime someone cleaned,I swear I was dying. There have been a few times I felt myself slipping but I know a host of Angels were present. Prayers were keeping me afloat and I was in Gods arms. I dont take any day for granted. I have always been grateful for life but I appreciate it with a brand new perspective.
Why did I share this? If your not praying for people or the Staff who is consistenly exposed to people like us your doing the world an injustice. Trust me, we joke all the time about this but this is not an average flu or virus. This thing will have you seeing your past relatives thinking your time is up. Seriously, please check in on your family members, friends, leaders etc. This is the time for us to band together and remain united. We will stand after this. The world singing “Hes Got the Whole World” is cute but we need national and global prayer.
2 Chronicles 7:14 King James Version (KJV)
14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.
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